Monday, August 31, 2009

Hate at First Sight

Every month, I walk into my new classes and I hate them on sight. It's not personal. I just hate everybody that I don't know; those in the classroom are no exception.The feeling usually passes once I share a few words with them and am forced to accept them as people, but up until that point? Hate.

Okay, hate is a bit strong. I'm exaggerating, as I do. Hate indicates a degree of caring, which doesn't exist in this case. Apathy or, at worst, distrust would be more appropriate. Whatever it is, while I follow something resembling the social code which I was taught (holding open doors for people, not cutting in line, and other such blah), people that I don't know don't really register as real people.

Midway through the second day of class, once I've attached names to faces and seen a glimpse of personality, I come around to the idea that my students are real people. By the end of the first week, we're all pretty tight, such that I can cater my lesson plans to each of their individual learning styles and personalities. By the end of the month, I can even imagine that some of them exist outside of the classroom; this is in part because they insist that I have a drink with them, an invite which I rarely decline.

When classes come to a close each month, all the names, which went with faces, most of which had personalities, move on. A new sea of nameless faces, which I hate on sight, then grow to see as people, and finally like, maybe just a little bit, replace the old.

It's an exhausting process.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow.....

Mrs. Kim said...

I like this post.

1994 said...

Adult students will usually waste the first week of a class because they are too shy to speak and make mistakes. It is awkward and uncomfortable. You’ll always have someone who is socially maladjusted and someone who has serious problems with English, i.e. doesn’t put verbs into sentences. Korean adults are Korean children, only grown. They will still made comments about your high nose or hairy arms, but unlike children, will not touch you. They will ask you child-like questions:
“James Teacher, why do you smile so much-y?”
“Because I am pretty. Americans tend to smile more; it puts other people at ease.”
Wrong answer. Imagine an middle age ajosshi with a plastic, smarmy Rain smile on his face constantly. It was seriously creepy.

franksatyr said...

Three cheers for yr good blog, BWB. Misanthropy is not a bad default mode of initial appraisal. Let all bastards prove themselves before the love thy neighbor thing etc.

Leelee Phoenix said...

Well, I know you and I hate you, so yeah.

The Sanity Inspector said...

Just surfed in and read a while, and looks like I've found Korean Rum Diary's bookend!

Learn Korean said...

Hi, great blog. I just sent you an email. Please let me know when you get a chance to read. Thx.